My babies

I did not know exactly how I would start this post, but I thought I should explain my 3 angel babies. I have my 1st baby which is my son who is a blessing and a miracle. We did not know when we got pregnant with him that he would be such a miracle, but soon learned over the years how much of one he is. My first pregnancy was pretty uneventful accept for the all day sickness and the toxemia I got at the end that made be blow up like a blowfish-ughh. I also looked like Freddy Crooger had gotten ahold of me, (ie-stretch marks, which I call blessing marks), from all the water weight I gained when the toxemia came on. Anyway Bub was born and he was just a very handsome little boy. He had colic so it was trying at first, but he was perfect and healthy. I had many problems hormonally after he was born so I was in and out of doctors offices for 2 years having every test under the sun run on me to which they only found out that I had some sort of autoimmune problem but they just could not pin point what. They gave me the go ahead to get pregnant so I got pregnant and 10 weeks later had a miscarriage and it was devastating so that was my first angel baby. I found myself back in the doctors offices and having more tests run only to be told it was probably chromosomal problems with the baby and to try again. I was not about to go thru that again so we waited a couple years tried again and 10 weeks later another miscarriage and my second angel baby. Here we go again to the doctors and all I could get was we will put you on prometrium next time -- all I could think was "ahhh next time do you think I can go thru this again." Well I really wanted a second child so a couple years after that we tried again and this time I made it to 17 weeks, but the baby had died at 14 and that was considered a Fetal death and this was even more heartbreaking than the first two, because I could actually see the baby in the sonogram. And that would be my third angel baby. What made the last pregnancy so bad was we had already told Bub and my husband had to explain to him that the baby did not grow properly and was in heaven. I have since seen my reproductive endocrinologist, who I started seeing right after Bub was born and he thinks I have some sort of blood clotting disorder that only shows up when I am pregnant and cuts off the baby's blood supply and the medications they want to put me on, aspirin and heparin, if I try again could also cause problems with delivery so I am not willing to chance it. I have my miracle child and he is my world and my 3 angel babies are being well taken care of in heaven and are watching over us.
**I changed my son's name in all of my posts to Bub, because I am paranoid like that:)**